Fear the Walking Dead recap: The worst kind of fever dream ever

For those that were looking forward to seeing how June (Jenna Elfman) and John Dorie Sr. (Keith Carradine) are faring down in Teddy’s (John Glover) old bunker, let me apologize upfront on behalf of AMC.

This episode of Fear the Walking Dead sucked.

Like, really badly.

But let’s take a better look at what happened and how Victor Strand (Colman Domingo) “saved” the day.

It’s been 69 days in the bunker

It takes a mere 69 days out of the magical number that June merely made up to keep John inside and not wanting to check out the radioactive world for everything to go to the crapper.

The pair have spent their days up to this point playing board games, calling into the abyss via the radio, drinking alcohol, and making radiation suits from duct tape. I’m not even joking.

They have plenty of food and a decent shelter, so it comes as no surprise that AMC throws a storm or some sh*t at them. This causes tremors inside the bunker and shelving holding some preserves and all of the alcohol falls over, revealing a hole in the wall.

Welcome to Teddy’s torture chamber

Once they break through, Teddy’s torture chamber is discovered, and John is immediately excited to close the case regarding Teddy. I mean, everything is said and done up to this point, right?

Wrong, there was one body — Cindy Hawkins (Brittany Bradford) — which was never found, hence the title for Episode 4 of Fear the Walking Dead. Now, John wants to work out where she was buried so he can lay her to rest.

Like there’s not a damn nuclear apocalypse going on outside presently. Although, to be fair, it probably beats playing the Game of Life board game for the millionth time.

Also, surprise, John is an alcoholic

Now that all the alcohol has been smashed, it’s time to reveal that John is an alcoholic. He had been drinking every day while in the bunker in order to keep the tremors at bay, but now they are hitting him pretty bad.

This, as Forbes points out, doesn’t make a lot of sense because John reveals he has gone from half a bottle of booze a day back to the small amounts in the bunker every day, so he should have weaned off it. But, considering John is going to have to use a gun later on in order to save the day, tremors make sense. I guess.

The fever dream hits

Along with the tremors, John starts hallucinating pretty hardcore. He starts seeing Cindy, who I must say, turns out to be a bit of b*tch, particularly when it comes to what seems to be jealousy every time June is around.

Enter the stupid part of this episode.

Basically, John decides that he will try and find Cindy’s remains in order to stop seeing dead people even though June warned him the hallucinations could be pretty fierce when coming off the booze.

This is also when he puts his entire faith in a map and the duct tape suits June made.

He leaves the bunker and immediately comes into contact with three people in suits. These guys had been trying to get in for a while now but had cleared off just long enough for John to go topside and nearly get bitten by a zombie who he thought was Cindy leading the way.

Oh, and to put Dakota (Zoe Colletti) out of her misery. Because even though she appeared to turn to dust in Season 6 of Fear the Walking Dead, she is now a zombie just hanging out and admiring the radioactive glow.

Lucky for John, June has realized what is going on and gets him back inside the bunker before anything goes too far awry.

But, unfortunately, now the guys in protective suits are even more determined to get inside the bunker.

The hallucinations get worse and John winds up back outside again, convinced that he will find Cindy’s body in a lot somewhere in Galveston. Because he thinks he can simply walk there from wherever the hell he is now.

Now the suited-up guys are back again and John has to rely on his shaky hands to shoot and, because plot, he manages to kill some of them too.

Only one manages to get inside, and John then has to save June’s a*s. The reason? There was another major shake-up in the bunker that resulted in a cave in and John decided to leave June trapped there so that he could follow his fever dream into certain death.

Once again, though, he turns into a sharpshooter and kills the guy, not a tremor in sight.

No one gets nice things in the zombie apocalypse — except Strand

After this, another major cave-in occurs in the bunker, and the body of Cindy is revealed inside the wall. John now feels like his job is done, and it’s goodbye fever dreams. (Please, AMC, don’t add in anymore “I see dead people” plots in Fear the Walking Dead because they suck.)

Finally, June decides she will follow John out into the apocalypse because it is obvious that even if you plan for everything, AMC will find a way to destroy your nice things and send you back out to tango with the dead.

However, just as they leave, one last big tremor hits the bunker, and they are trapped.

Luckily, they had their face masks on and this was the only thing that saved them until Victor Strand came by. It turns out he had heard them on the radio and decided now was a good time to save them.

Plus, Victor likely didn’t have a nurse or a cop in his collection just yet.

John wakes up after being out cold for a few days and June cues him in onto the wonderful news that they are alive and safe — but the downside is they are trapped in Victor’s tower and the undead are being used as a way to keep everyone trapped inside.

A few things we learned in this episode — and something we didn’t

The episode may have ended with June and John finding out they were trapped in a new kind of hell, but there were a few things to be gleaned inside of all the stupid this installment of Fear the Walking Dead contained.

Firstly, the guys in protective suits attacking the bunker? They’re not a part of Victor’s crew.

This means that there are currently two groups of antagonists for Season 7.

Morgan also heard John’s radio calls. However, he was too late and got there after Victor rescued June and John.

This gave Victor a chance to catch up with Morgan via radio and give him the lowdown on how awesome he is and how much it sucks to be Morgan right now.

Morgan responded by promising to kill him if he hurts any of his friends. Did AMC just forget about the whole annoying arc of how Morgan won’t kill people?

Finally, the one thing we didn’t find out more about is what “Padre” means. Previously, each episode has given viewers a nugget or two regarding where — or who — Padre is.

It looks like viewers will have to tune into next week’s episode of Fear the Walking Dead in order to find out more. (But, please, I repeat, no more ghosties AMC.)

Season 7 of Fear the Walking Dead is currently airing every Sunday night on AMC.