This season of My Big Fat Fabulous Life is wrapped up, so that means it’s time to drag everyone together to bicker and open old wounds with the help of host Shaun Robinson. Yay! I’m not sure it’s in good taste for this to be on The Skinny, but why should anyone care about tact? This is like the TLC version of a cage match.
As expected, we run through the greatest hits of the season. Even though it’s surely unpleasant for Whitney to have to walk through her non-pregnancy yet again, that’s what we do. She gets teary-eyed talking about her fears that this false positive might be as close as she gets to carrying a child, but that’s a little too real. Let’s bring out Roy!
I have high hopes for Roy’s appearance on the show. Whitney is no longer his intern, and the opportunity for him to admit he flirted with Whitney incessantly when she was is definitely here. But Roy admits he didn’t pick up on Whitney’s broad hints that she was interested. I suspect Roy has a sexual harrassment lawsuit in his future if he ever thinks texting anyone as much as he texted Whitney is just friendly.
Roy reveals he’s single now, but he wasn’t when Whitney hit on him — and he seems to be deeply offended that she would accuse him of lying about a girlfriend. We cut to commercial before we dig any deeper, but I’m getting the impression that both Roy and Whitney are backpedalling away from any potential relationship with the frantic energy of caffeinated weasels. What went wrong?
Even Babs told the guy he’d love having her as a mother-in-law, which I strongly doubt.
Then, the truth bubbles up. Roy seems unnerved that everyone and their dog called him a douchebag online for leading Whitney on. Shaun tries to get him to kiss Whitney, and he won’t even consider it because he doesn’t want to deal with the backlash.
It seems the old Interwebs have snuffed out whatever chance Whitney and Roy might have had for happy coupledom. I’d be sad about it, but Whitney is all grown up at 32, and Roy is 24. She needs to find a grown-up, and Roy isn’t it.
A better partner would be Amanda, who didn’t come to the reunion show. While her parents squirm a little (lot), Whitney admits he’s heteroflexible, which isn’t a big revelation. What is more disturbing is that Babs would have been fine with Whitney sticking with Nathan, shrugging and admitting “People say incest is best. Its the South!”
A bigger surprise than Babs giving the thumbs-up to kissing cousins is Jiya’s appearance on the show. While she often seemed hostile and competitive with Whitney, she handles the reunion with more grace than some of the regulars who should know better. She might accept a dance battle rematch, but she’s a busy girl. She’s running two businesses and she’s in school for her Ph.D. Good for Jiya.
Jiya even goes so far as to apologize to Whitney. She wants to push her students, but she doesn’t want anyone to feel as crappy as Whitney did the day she took her class. I’d argue that demanding a medical note isn’t the best way to build self-esteem, but the fact that Jiya wasn’t argumentative and throwing punches on the reunion show suggests she’s not as horrible as I thought.
Then, there’s Buddy. Buddy, Buddy, Buddy.
Buddy wasn’t much more than background static for most of the season, the slow-moving bear who shows up for workouts occasionally and mostly sits on the sofa. The idea that he’d emerge as the big, angry baby on the reunion begs belief, but that’s exactly what happened.
When Shaun turns the topic to Buddy not being the most reliable tenant, Buddy gets angry. It’s hard to tell, because angry on Buddy doesn’t look all that different from happy or tired or hungover, but he’s definitely angry. He points out that Whitney owes him for Internet, and tells Shaun these questions are obnoxious.
He storms off the set, flipping off the camera and whining about how he’s tired of looking like a loser. Still. he comes back, because he doesn’t want to look like a cry baby. Shaun is not impressed.
After all this drama, I’m expecting an epic throwdown when they finally get to the biggest blowout of the season — the fight between Todd and Whitney in New York.
Though Todd still seems put out that everyone thinks he was jealous of Whitney, he seems determined to play the part of happy, easy-going best friend — more or less.
When Whitney admits she might still go on the tour with the Fitness Marshall, Todd has to point out that Whitney is desperate for approval from other people, not her long-suffering friends.
Even Tal can’t swallow this and declares that Whitney is extremely loyal. Instead of telling Todd he is a big baby man who can’t even admit to his own childish behavior being ungraceful in the extreme, she doubles down on soft pets. She appreciates him! He bends over backwards for her!
He is a big, gay kitten who is so, so wonderful! Whitney even tells Todd she wants to go back to New York with him. He isn’t interested. Todd can say he’s not jealous all he wants, but this face says otherwise.
So, we wrap up the reunion with no real answers and possibly more questions than when we started. Roy may or may not like Whitney, but it probably doesn’t matter. Buddy may or may not be behind in the rent, but it definitely doesn’t matter. Todd may or may not be a crappy friend, but Whitney doesn’t care. Jiya may accept a rematch, but if she’s smart she won’t.
If we’re lucky, Whitney will go on tour with the Fitness Marshall next season, though I hope that doesn’t mean many episodes of watching Todd pout and make nasty comments about Whitney’s weight. Only time will tell.