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Recap: “Vanderpump Rules,” Pump Is Where You Take Your Boyfriend Edition

After finishing up “Vanderpump Rules” last season by proving that pretty boys can fight – they just don’t hit anywhere it could affect a modeling career – the whole same crew of idiots is back working at Sur. What was Lisa Vanderpump thinking? I’d say it’s all about ratings. She must have a real staff

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Recap: “Below Deck” Finale on BravoTV, The Runny Scrambled Eggs Edition

Tonight’s “Below Deck” finale on BravoTV was predictable and almost boring. Let me break it down to one paragraph. Crew spends season f**king up, f**king each other, disrespecting guests, providing poor service and generally hating each other. In the final episode, everybody makes fake apologies, they pull off one almost-perfect charter, hearts get broken, and

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Recap: BravoTV’s “Below Deck,” The Svengali Brainwasher Weirdo Edition

Tonight was downright fascinating on BravoTV’s “Below Deck.” Finally, somebody gave them what they deserved – a reduced tip for s**tty service. Not that I thought this primary charter guest was a class act – his comment about them being their slaves right before he boarded told us otherwise. But I’m sick of watching the

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Recap: “Below Deck” on BravoTV, The Beluga Caviar Edition

Tonight’s “Below Deck” on BravoTV was yet another glaring example of how completely slack and disrespectful the Ohana’s yacht crew behaves toward the guests… and their captain. Captain Lee finally shows his backbone, thank God. It may be too little too late though. Remember Kelley’s birthday party last week when he danced a stripper pole

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Recap: BravoTV’s ‘Below Deck,’ The Captain Crunch Edition

I’m baffled by tonight’s episode of “Below Deck” on BravoTV. For once, there was no drama with the guests and yet the crew still managed to have a s**tty attitude about the charter. The Irish rugby players had a good time, but they were only on the boat for 22 hours. Apparently, that means they

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Recap: BravoTV’s “Below Deck” Broken Whiskey Bottle Edition

I think a lot of last season’s viewers tuned back in to BravoTV’s “Below Deck” tonight for the highly anticipated return of last season’s star, Adrienne Gang. And she did not disappoint. Upon seeing her on the beach, Eddie simply turned and ran away, jumped back in the tender and went back to the boat.

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Recap: Bravo’s “Below Deck” Pillow Stain-Gate

Oh Kat, you were doing so well this season! I actually thought you had learned a little bit of professionalism and decorum on Season One of Bravo’s “Below Deck.” But I was wrong. Between the audio porn show you and Ben put on for most of the crew and the white spot the two of

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Recap: BravoTV ‘Below Deck’ #PenisGate

More than a third of tonight’s “Below Deck” episode on BravoTV was dedicated to #PenisGate. No, seriously. Last week, the yacht’s seriously unprofessional, resting-bitch-face Chief Stew made a penis-shaped blanket on the primary guest’s bed (possibly offensive since he’s gay?) and tonight we got to see it… over and over. With everyone’s reactions. Here’s the

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Recap: BravoTV’s ‘Below Deck,’ The I’m Not Your Geisha Boy Edition

Tonight’s episode of BravoTV’s “Below Deck” should have been titled “What Not to Do in the Service Industry.” Then everybody watching could have treated that hot mess like a live tutorial on how not to behave toward paying guests on a multi-million dollar charter yacht. No seriously, as somebody who owns a company that provides

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Recap: ‘Below Deck,’ How NOT to Treat the Guests Edition

We all knew that deckhand Andrew was lying about his experience on BravoTV’s “Below Deck,” but we didn’t realize quite how bad it was. Like it was total fiction. Kid doesn’t know anything about anything and it’s actually dangerous for him and the rest of the crew. You have to know what the heck you’re